Comments on: Till It’s Gone http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/ go explore. experience. and be inspired. Fri, 10 Sep 2010 13:22:22 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: adelyn http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1649 adelyn Sun, 27 Dec 2009 18:02:02 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1649 Dear Keith, While reading what you wrote about your dad, I can't help but recall the scenerio during his last moments. You have written such a beautiful article. I felt emotional as it really touched my heart. I think I’m learning something here. You were just being honest and made you realized how you felt about each other. Your dad had been the most wonderful and special person in my life and I thank God I got to know him. He had always liked to be himself but with a positive attitude. He loved flying and watching all programmes about aircrafts and the likes on TV. He even said he wanted to see the next FIFA cup. I also felt so sorry for him when the changed management declined his request for extention of service after his retirement as he knew he could still contribute. I noticed that he was very sad and really disappointed with the outcome but he never gave up by trying other airlines. He had always cared and concerned about the family and surely had been proud of his children. I remembered he mentioned about the thesis you wrote and finally started off as a banker, your brother's promotion and your sister maybe having her own business one day that you all are doing very well and are successful. I am sure he understood you by telling me how one's culture and life is like over there unlike back home. Truth is, your father had never loved you less, only missed you when you were thousands of kilometers away. Good thing, communication now seemed so easy. He was happy and excited whenever he was able to meet up with his children just to enjoy a meal together. Life is never the same without him but he used to remind me that, whatever happens, life goes on. I will forever remember his high spirits and great sense of humour. Did you say that he might be small in size but had a big heart? It’s so true as he was the kindest man many people knew. My father was also in a coma before he died. I felt guilty for not telling him earlier how thankful I was, he didn’t give the family any problems as he already reached 87. We always took him for granted never asking about his health. He took care of himself, seldom visiting any doctor. I told him on that critical day anyway. I wasn’t sure if he heard me. My father and him were good buddies. They used to drink guinness stout/beer together whenever we came to the house. I miss them both very much. Thanks again for sharing and feeling good about it. Bye and take care. Sincere regards Ad Dear Keith,
While reading what you wrote about your dad, I can’t help but recall the scenerio during his last moments. You have written such a beautiful article. I felt emotional as it really touched my heart. I think I’m learning something here. You were just being honest and made you realized how you felt about each other. Your dad had been the most wonderful and special person in my life and I thank God I got to know him. He had always liked to be himself but with a positive attitude. He loved flying and watching all programmes about aircrafts and the likes on TV. He even said he wanted to see the next FIFA cup. I also felt so sorry for him when the changed management declined his request for extention of service after his retirement as he knew he could still contribute. I noticed that he was very sad and really disappointed with the outcome but he never gave up by trying other airlines. He had always cared and concerned about the family and surely had been proud of his children. I remembered he mentioned about the thesis you wrote and finally started off as a banker, your brother’s promotion and your sister maybe having her own business one day that you all are doing very well and are successful. I am sure he understood you by telling me how one’s culture and life is like over there unlike back home. Truth is, your father had never loved you less, only missed you when you were thousands of kilometers away. Good thing, communication now seemed so easy. He was happy and excited whenever he was able to meet up with his children just to enjoy a meal together. Life is never the same without him but he used to remind me that, whatever happens, life goes on. I will forever remember his high spirits and great sense of humour. Did you say that he might be small in size but had a big heart? It’s so true as he was the kindest man many people knew. My father was also in a coma before he died. I felt guilty for not telling him earlier how thankful I was, he didn’t give the family any problems as he already reached 87. We always took him for granted never asking about his health. He took care of himself, seldom visiting any doctor. I told him on that critical day anyway. I wasn’t sure if he heard me. My father and him were good buddies. They used to drink guinness stout/beer together whenever we came to the house. I miss them both very much. Thanks again for sharing and feeling good about it. Bye and take care.

Sincere regards
Ad

]]> By: Rob http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1620 Rob Sun, 20 Dec 2009 17:09:08 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1620 Hi Keith, Qúe taL? What a beautifull story again.. Hi Keith, Qúe taL?
What a beautifull story again..

]]> By: velvet http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1590 velvet Sun, 13 Dec 2009 22:57:52 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1590 That would make a great new year's resolution! :-) Wish you all the best. Thanks so much for your comment. Cheers, Keith That would make a great new year’s resolution! :-) Wish you all the best. Thanks so much for your comment.

Cheers,
Keith

]]> By: waitinginthedark http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1586 waitinginthedark Sat, 12 Dec 2009 23:31:03 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1586 It's a long time that I didn't feel moved as I was while reading about you ar your father. I lost mine in 2000 and it was as if the world was stopping. In a very childish way, I thought that my father was immortal, that he would always be close to me. We also had our contrasts, smoothed out over the years. But I know that even when he was not approving my decisions - and this happened many times - he was anyway on my side. Thanks for sharing such a personal story. It teached me a lot. About human relations and how they can develop also through the web. A tribute to your dad and to you. Simon It’s a long time that I didn’t feel moved as I was while reading about you ar your father. I lost mine in 2000 and it was as if the world was stopping. In a very childish way, I thought that my father was immortal, that he would always be close to me. We also had our contrasts, smoothed out over the years. But I know that even when he was not approving my decisions – and this happened many times – he was anyway on my side.

Thanks for sharing such a personal story. It teached me a lot. About human relations and how they can develop also through the web.

A tribute to your dad and to you.
Simon

]]> By: A Lil Fat Monkey http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1584 A Lil Fat Monkey Fri, 11 Dec 2009 14:46:46 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1584 I'm totally moved by your tribute to your dad. I'm sure he's secretly smiling down knowing how much he meant to you, like a father would to his son. I can't help but relate to your story. My father and I have never had a smooth relationship all these years. We've gone through so many fights in the past that we're all wounded and battered by the past. Now, I often find ourselves sitting in the silence with nothing to say to each other. And the moment he does say something, I'd walk away. I find myself feeling agitated. I know I shouldn't. Your story spoke to me that perhaps, it's NOT him who needs to pick up the pieces and start anew. Perhaps it is I who should stop being petty and give the old man a chance. Perhaps that should be my new year's resolution. Thanks for sharing. I’m totally moved by your tribute to your dad. I’m sure he’s secretly smiling down knowing how much he meant to you, like a father would to his son.

I can’t help but relate to your story. My father and I have never had a smooth relationship all these years. We’ve gone through so many fights in the past that we’re all wounded and battered by the past. Now, I often find ourselves sitting in the silence with nothing to say to each other. And the moment he does say something, I’d walk away. I find myself feeling agitated. I know I shouldn’t.

Your story spoke to me that perhaps, it’s NOT him who needs to pick up the pieces and start anew. Perhaps it is I who should stop being petty and give the old man a chance. Perhaps that should be my new year’s resolution.

Thanks for sharing.

]]> By: Linny C http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1583 Linny C Fri, 11 Dec 2009 04:17:04 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1583 Dear Keith, What a beautiful tribute to your father. Your grace and courage melted my heart. I admire your gratitude for the fullfilling life he lived. There is no bigger gift. Wishing you and your brother and sister continued peace, LC Dear Keith,

What a beautiful tribute to your father. Your grace and courage melted my heart.

I admire your gratitude for the fullfilling life he lived. There is no bigger gift.

Wishing you and your brother and sister continued peace,
LC

]]> By: velvet http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1581 velvet Fri, 11 Dec 2009 01:04:06 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1581 Hi Camilo, You're right. I certainly didn't expect to receive so many responses. I'm really grateful for the wonderful comments. Definitely gives me something to think about too. :-) Cheers, Keith Hi Camilo,
You’re right. I certainly didn’t expect to receive so many responses. I’m really grateful for the wonderful comments. Definitely gives me something to think about too. :-)

Cheers,
Keith

]]> By: Camilo Olea http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1568 Camilo Olea Thu, 10 Dec 2009 19:08:41 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1568 Keith, I'm sure you got so many responses to this post, precisely because of the nature of it. What you SHARED are REAL, AUTHENTIC, human emotions. Theres nothing that catches our attention more than a true, authentic, human story. I'm sure you'll have lots to think about for the next posts to come. =) Keep them human & authentic and you'll keep getting lots of comments, I'm sure! All the best from Cancun, Camilo Keith,

I’m sure you got so many responses to this post, precisely because of the nature of it. What you SHARED are REAL, AUTHENTIC, human emotions. Theres nothing that catches our attention more than a true, authentic, human story.

I’m sure you’ll have lots to think about for the next posts to come. =) Keep them human & authentic and you’ll keep getting lots of comments, I’m sure!

All the best from Cancun,
Camilo

]]> By: velvet http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1566 velvet Thu, 10 Dec 2009 17:24:42 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1566 Wow, I'm simply overwhelmed by your comments. I was initially hesitant about publishing this personal story but I'm so glad I did (thank you Gwen & Zoë for providing that final nudge!). A special mention (& lots of kisses, hugs & love) goes to my Mum who left a heart-warming comment. I love you Mum. Thank you so much for your beautiful comments and for sharing your experiences of losing a loved one. Lots of love & big hugs, Keith Wow, I’m simply overwhelmed by your comments. I was initially hesitant about publishing this personal story but I’m so glad I did (thank you Gwen & Zoë for providing that final nudge!). A special mention (& lots of kisses, hugs & love) goes to my Mum who left a heart-warming comment. I love you Mum.

Thank you so much for your beautiful comments and for sharing your experiences of losing a loved one.

Lots of love & big hugs,
Keith

]]> By: Evelyn Hannon http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1563 Evelyn Hannon Thu, 10 Dec 2009 15:52:41 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1563 Keith, What you have learned about living and dying cannot simply be taught. Unfortunately, it only comes with personal experience. And even with that personal experience some never grasp the lessons that you've so beautifully expressed in this post. You have my admiration and respect. Keith,
What you have learned about living and dying cannot simply be taught. Unfortunately, it only comes with personal experience. And even with that personal experience some never grasp the lessons that you’ve so beautifully expressed in this post. You have my admiration and respect.

]]> By: Janice http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1562 Janice Thu, 10 Dec 2009 15:19:32 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1562 I am a child who has lost a father and a mother of four sons who lost theirs. Loss is a huge challenge in our lives but living and representing our feelings, whether in words, art, music..., helps us live our losses with some comfort. Thank you for representing your feelings and emotions so eloquently. It is an act of kindness and generosity to us all that you have. Love to you, your siblings and your mother. I am a child who has lost a father and a mother of four sons who lost theirs. Loss is a huge challenge in our lives but living and representing our feelings, whether in words, art, music…, helps us live our losses with some comfort.

Thank you for representing your feelings and emotions so eloquently. It is an act of kindness and generosity to us all that you have.

Love to you, your siblings and your mother.

]]> By: Theresa Jenkins http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1560 Theresa Jenkins Thu, 10 Dec 2009 14:07:27 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1560 Keith, its so beautiful and touching. It was great of you to get it off your chest and share it with others. I am sure lots of us would have learned something from it. Daddy was a simple man. His love was aeroplanes and flying. Knowing him, he would have tried to understand your banking world. Your sister was in the same boat. Everytime she comes home after having lunch with Daddy, she would say "Daddy still doesn't know, I am a pastry chef". To Daddy a 'cook is a cook', no difference. I suppose it was easier with your brother as they both have the same interest. Can't imagine he is gone. Although we have been separated for years, in our own funny way, we still cared for each other. It was also so touching to see many of his ex-colleagues, some of whom we have not seen for over 20 years, friends, family and relations at the Wake and Funeral. Lots of people cared for him. As parents, sometimes we don't show how much we care and love you but you can be sure, every parent cares and loves their children very much. Daddy died a very proud and happy man knowing he has such great children. Love Mum. Keith, its so beautiful and touching. It was great of you to get it off your chest and share it with others. I am sure lots of us would have learned something from it.

Daddy was a simple man. His love was aeroplanes and flying. Knowing him, he would have tried to understand your banking world. Your sister was in the same boat. Everytime she comes home after having lunch with Daddy, she would say “Daddy still doesn’t know, I am a pastry chef”. To Daddy a ‘cook is a cook’, no difference. I suppose it was easier with your brother as they both have the same interest.

Can’t imagine he is gone. Although we have been separated for years, in our own funny way, we still cared for each other. It was also so touching to see many of his ex-colleagues, some of whom we have not seen for over 20 years, friends, family and relations at the Wake and Funeral. Lots of people cared for him.

As parents, sometimes we don’t show how much we care and love you but you can be sure, every parent cares and loves their children very much.

Daddy died a very proud and happy man knowing he has such great children.

Love
Mum.

]]> By: Sandy Salle http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1559 Sandy Salle Thu, 10 Dec 2009 13:47:39 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1559 Keith - I love how you write straight from the heart, it is such a moving story and I have learned so much from you sharing your story. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Sx Keith – I love how you write straight from the heart, it is such a moving story and I have learned so much from you sharing your story. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Sx

]]> By: LadyExpat http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1555 LadyExpat Thu, 10 Dec 2009 07:42:14 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1555 This is my first visit to your blog. Thank you for writing and sharing such a beautiful tribute to your father. This is my first visit to your blog.

Thank you for writing and sharing such a beautiful tribute to your father.

]]> By: Donna Hull http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1554 Donna Hull Thu, 10 Dec 2009 01:17:21 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1554 This is a really beautiful, heartfelt story. I'm so glad you wrote it. I'm even more glad that you shared it. This is a really beautiful, heartfelt story. I’m so glad you wrote it. I’m even more glad that you shared it.

]]> By: velvet http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1552 velvet Thu, 10 Dec 2009 01:00:58 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1552 Dear Camilo, Katy, Jen, Sonya, JoAnna, Joanne & Dian, Thank you so much for your lovely comments. I'm really glad I published this story and I really hope it inspires others to cherish their loved ones (where's that phone? Give them a call :-) ) - life is indeed fragile. That's the lesson I learned and I'm honoured to have this opportunity to pass it on. Lots of hugs, Keith Dear Camilo, Katy, Jen, Sonya, JoAnna, Joanne & Dian,
Thank you so much for your lovely comments. I’m really glad I published this story and I really hope it inspires others to cherish their loved ones (where’s that phone? Give them a call :-) ) – life is indeed fragile. That’s the lesson I learned and I’m honoured to have this opportunity to pass it on.

Lots of hugs,
Keith

]]> By: Camilo Olea http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1551 Camilo Olea Wed, 09 Dec 2009 23:30:14 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1551 Dear Keith: Kudos on writing this. It takes strength & courage to do so. Showing one's emotions always takes strength & courage, and it makes us better persons. I'm sorry for your loss, and I perfectly understand your point. My dad and I are similar, very different backgrounds, very different opinions (sometimes), he just "doesn't get" my world, either... but like you say, I accept him like he is, and I love him just like he is. He has been a great example to me. Please receive a big hug from Cancun from me =) Life goes on. Like I once saw written into a wall at Palenque, Chiapas (one of my favorite places on earth) "Life is beautiful, don't stop travelling" It sure is... and be sure you don't. ;) All the best to you, amigo. Camilo Dear Keith:

Kudos on writing this. It takes strength & courage to do so. Showing one’s emotions always takes strength & courage, and it makes us better persons. I’m sorry for your loss, and I perfectly understand your point. My dad and I are similar, very different backgrounds, very different opinions (sometimes), he just “doesn’t get” my world, either… but like you say, I accept him like he is, and I love him just like he is. He has been a great example to me.

Please receive a big hug from Cancun from me =) Life goes on.

Like I once saw written into a wall at Palenque, Chiapas (one of my favorite places on earth)

“Life is beautiful, don’t stop travelling”

It sure is… and be sure you don’t. ;)

All the best to you, amigo.

Camilo

]]> By: Katy http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1550 Katy Wed, 09 Dec 2009 22:25:12 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1550 Keith, This post absolutely broke my heart. I am devastated to hear about your loss, but so happy that you shared this with the rest of the travel community. Just as your dad was a huge inspiration to you, you are an inspiration to all of us. Although I have not lost a parent, this post was definitely an eye-opener and made me realize how important friends and family really are - differences or no differences. Again, thank you for sharing, Keith. My thoughts are with you! Katy Keith,
This post absolutely broke my heart. I am devastated to hear about your loss, but so happy that you shared this with the rest of the travel community. Just as your dad was a huge inspiration to you, you are an inspiration to all of us.

Although I have not lost a parent, this post was definitely an eye-opener and made me realize how important friends and family really are – differences or no differences.

Again, thank you for sharing, Keith. My thoughts are with you!

Katy

]]> By: jen Laceda http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1548 jen Laceda Wed, 09 Dec 2009 19:54:01 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1548 Hi Keith, I am bawling my eyes at the moment, reading your story. I kept imagining what if this happened to my dad? How would I handle it? How would I feel? Will I ever survive such a heartache? Losing a loved one is never easy. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I'm sure many out there can relate to what you've been through, and I hope to be ready when the time comes for me...It's pretty ironic that Sept. 9 will always mean different things to us both - your dad's passing and my birthday. And although it seems like they are polar opposites of each other, in reality, life and death should always be celebrated because we all know how fragile we can be! Be strong, Jen Hi Keith,
I am bawling my eyes at the moment, reading your story. I kept imagining what if this happened to my dad? How would I handle it? How would I feel? Will I ever survive such a heartache? Losing a loved one is never easy. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I’m sure many out there can relate to what you’ve been through, and I hope to be ready when the time comes for me…It’s pretty ironic that Sept. 9 will always mean different things to us both – your dad’s passing and my birthday. And although it seems like they are polar opposites of each other, in reality, life and death should always be celebrated because we all know how fragile we can be!
Be strong,
Jen

]]> By: Sonya http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1547 Sonya Wed, 09 Dec 2009 19:27:34 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1547 Your beautiful post about your father is so touching, Keith! Thank you for honestly sharing your thoughts and feelings during a difficult time. I know your writing will help others dealing with their own grief. Take good care of yourself! Your beautiful post about your father is so touching, Keith! Thank you for honestly sharing your thoughts and feelings during a difficult time. I know your writing will help others dealing with their own grief.
Take good care of yourself!

]]> By: JoAnna http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1546 JoAnna Wed, 09 Dec 2009 19:25:56 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1546 What a touching story Keith. I'm sorry for your loss, though I know there are no words that can really say anything. Thank you, anyway, for sharing your thoughts with us. What a touching story Keith. I’m sorry for your loss, though I know there are no words that can really say anything. Thank you, anyway, for sharing your thoughts with us.

]]> By: Dian Emery http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1545 Dian Emery Wed, 09 Dec 2009 19:15:43 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1545 Keith, Thank you for sharing this deeply personal story about your Dad. How wonderful it is that you were able to spend some time with him in the last few months before he passed away. It would have been so sad if you didn't have these cherished moments to keep and to hold into the future. I am so sorry for your loss and I will keep this story in mind as I attempt to deal with my own unresolved issues with my 80 year old Dad. Dian Keith,
Thank you for sharing this deeply personal story about your Dad. How wonderful it is that you were able to spend some time with him in the last few months before he passed away. It would have been so sad if you didn’t have these cherished moments to keep and to hold into the future.

I am so sorry for your loss and I will keep this story in mind as I attempt to deal with my own unresolved issues with my 80 year old Dad.

Dian

]]> By: TastetheWorld http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1544 TastetheWorld Wed, 09 Dec 2009 18:18:29 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1544 Dear Keith, What a heartfelt piece. I am so glad to know you and your dad are at peace. I lost my dad this year in a car accident and did not have the chance to say a proper goodbye. I lost my mom a few months prior to dad's accident and was able to spend her last 3 weeks together. There is no good way to lose a parent but knowing you are loved by them makes those left behind a little less lost. Thanks for sharing. Joanne Dear Keith,

What a heartfelt piece. I am so glad to know you and your dad are at peace. I lost my dad this year in a car accident and did not have the chance to say a proper goodbye. I lost my mom a few months prior to dad’s accident and was able to spend her last 3 weeks together. There is no good way to lose a parent but knowing you are loved by them makes those left behind a little less lost.

Thanks for sharing.

Joanne

]]> By: velvet http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1543 velvet Wed, 09 Dec 2009 16:55:38 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1543 Thank you Adam, Amy, John & Vera Marie for your lovely comments and best wishes. I wrote this story more than a month ago when the emotions were still running high and I found it really helped me deal with the emotions a lot better. I was too nervous to publish it then but my friends (who knew I'd written something) encouraged me to publish it one day. I felt that now's probably a good time, two months after my Dad's passing. I'm glad I did and I really hope this article helps and/or inspires others. Keith Thank you Adam, Amy, John & Vera Marie for your lovely comments and best wishes. I wrote this story more than a month ago when the emotions were still running high and I found it really helped me deal with the emotions a lot better. I was too nervous to publish it then but my friends (who knew I’d written something) encouraged me to publish it one day. I felt that now’s probably a good time, two months after my Dad’s passing. I’m glad I did and I really hope this article helps and/or inspires others.

Keith

]]> By: Adam Axon http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1542 Adam Axon Wed, 09 Dec 2009 16:49:14 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1542 It takes a great deal of personal courage to be able to come to terms with your feelings when such raw emotion is still an ever present. It takes an even greater amount of courage to be able to publicise your feelings to the world and it's a testament for the strong bond you obviously shared with your father. My deepest commiserations for your lost and thank you for sharing. Those with similar experiences will gain strength from reading this. The very fact that whilst you're dealing with great personal loss you're still helping others is testament to the strength of your character and humanity. I wish you all the best during this difficult time, Adam It takes a great deal of personal courage to be able to come to terms with your feelings when such raw emotion is still an ever present. It takes an even greater amount of courage to be able to publicise your feelings to the world and it’s a testament for the strong bond you obviously shared with your father.

My deepest commiserations for your lost and thank you for sharing. Those with similar experiences will gain strength from reading this. The very fact that whilst you’re dealing with great personal loss you’re still helping others is testament to the strength of your character and humanity.

I wish you all the best during this difficult time,

Adam

]]> By: Amy @ The Q Family http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1541 Amy @ The Q Family Wed, 09 Dec 2009 16:48:06 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1541 I'm so sorry for your loss, Keith. I'm glad that you find support in your friends and family during that tough time in your life. It's such a beautiful story and such a great honor to your father. I'm sure he is very proud of who you are and who you have become. Thoughts and prayers for you! I’m so sorry for your loss, Keith. I’m glad that you find support in your friends and family during that tough time in your life.

It’s such a beautiful story and such a great honor to your father. I’m sure he is very proud of who you are and who you have become.

Thoughts and prayers for you!

]]> By: John http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1540 John Wed, 09 Dec 2009 16:46:21 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1540 Keith - like you I had some differences with my own dad and I was with him when he died too. 3 months before then , I had finally managed to tell him I love him after 40 years. It was such a hard thing to do, so I make sure I tell my own kids I love them every time I see them or talk to them on the phone. and I'm happy to say they seem to be able to say the same to me without embarrassment. Talking and touching and sharing are the things that make life worth while. You're right about not letting petty things get in the way - there's someone I need to call now - Thanks :-) Keith – like you I had some differences with my own dad and I was with him when he died too. 3 months before then , I had finally managed to tell him I love him after 40 years. It was such a hard thing to do, so I make sure I tell my own kids I love them every time I see them or talk to them on the phone. and I’m happy to say they seem to be able to say the same to me without embarrassment. Talking and touching and sharing are the things that make life worth while.

You’re right about not letting petty things get in the way – there’s someone I need to call now – Thanks :-)

]]> By: Vera Marie Badertscher http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1539 Vera Marie Badertscher Wed, 09 Dec 2009 16:20:21 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1539 What a beautiful story, and you have been so deeply honest about your life and feelings. I thought that I would never survive losing my dad, and when he died in 1996 it was wrenching. He taught me so many things. He was interested in weather and taught me the names of the clouds--cumulus, cirrus, nimbus--and when I see beautiful clouds over the Tucson mountains, I want to show off my knowledge and say, "Look Daddy, cumulo nimbus." I have never been able to write about it, but all these years later, I find myself telling one of his lame jokes, "as my father would say." And now I'm in tears, too. What a beautiful story, and you have been so deeply honest about your life and feelings.
I thought that I would never survive losing my dad, and when he died in 1996 it was wrenching. He taught me so many things. He was interested in weather and taught me the names of the clouds–cumulus, cirrus, nimbus–and when I see beautiful clouds over the Tucson mountains, I want to show off my knowledge and say, “Look Daddy, cumulo nimbus.” I have never been able to write about it, but all these years later, I find myself telling one of his lame jokes, “as my father would say.” And now I’m in tears, too.

]]> By: velvet http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1538 velvet Wed, 09 Dec 2009 15:42:30 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1538 Hi Zoë, Thank you too for encouraging me to publish this story. I really hope that this story helps others who might've gone through/is going through a similar situation; writing about it certainly helped me. Big hugs, Keith Hi Zoë,
Thank you too for encouraging me to publish this story. I really hope that this story helps others who might’ve gone through/is going through a similar situation; writing about it certainly helped me.

Big hugs,
Keith

]]> By: Zoe Dawes aka Quirky Traveller http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1537 Zoe Dawes aka Quirky Traveller Wed, 09 Dec 2009 15:34:41 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1537 Well done for sharing your story Keith. It is not always easy to do that and yet now you have I am sure you will get untold consolation from that sharing. Nothing prepares us for the loss of a parent and going through that experience is a very personal and unique journey - but it also is a universal story and one that benefits from the telling from an individual perspective. As you know, my Dad died suddenly of a heart attack and my Mum from prolonged cancer - neither was easy but sharing the pain helped me and I am sure this will help others... as well as hopefully easing your pain. Lots of love - Zoe xxx Well done for sharing your story Keith. It is not always easy to do that and yet now you have I am sure you will get untold consolation from that sharing. Nothing prepares us for the loss of a parent and going through that experience is a very personal and unique journey – but it also is a universal story and one that benefits from the telling from an individual perspective.

As you know, my Dad died suddenly of a heart attack and my Mum from prolonged cancer – neither was easy but sharing the pain helped me and I am sure this will help others… as well as hopefully easing your pain.

Lots of love – Zoe xxx

]]> By: velvet http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1536 velvet Wed, 09 Dec 2009 15:18:56 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1536 Thank you Kathryn. You're so right - a community of friends can indeed make the darkest of times just a tiny bit brighter. Hugs, Keith Thank you Kathryn. You’re so right – a community of friends can indeed make the darkest of times just a tiny bit brighter.

Hugs,
Keith

]]> By: Travelfusion http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1535 Travelfusion Wed, 09 Dec 2009 15:11:20 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1535 Beautiful post Keith, and thank you so much for sharing. I haven't had to endure losing a parent yet but it's stories like yours that remind me that a community of friends can make the darkest times even a tiny bit brighter. I'm sure your dad was very proud of you! HUGS! Kathryn Beautiful post Keith, and thank you so much for sharing.

I haven’t had to endure losing a parent yet but it’s stories like yours that remind me that a community of friends can make the darkest times even a tiny bit brighter.

I’m sure your dad was very proud of you!

HUGS!
Kathryn

]]> By: velvet http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1534 velvet Wed, 09 Dec 2009 15:02:00 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1534 Hi S, Glad it was worth the wait. I did hang on to this story for quite a while and you knew I'd written it. You're a precious friend to have. Thank you once again. Big hugs & lots of love, Keith Hi S,
Glad it was worth the wait. I did hang on to this story for quite a while and you knew I’d written it. You’re a precious friend to have. Thank you once again.

Big hugs & lots of love,
Keith

]]> By: TravelDesigned http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1532 TravelDesigned Wed, 09 Dec 2009 14:51:43 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1532 Keith, I have been waiting two months for you to write this. It was MORE than worth the wait!! It was kind of you to mention me but, not necessary--I am your friend and I love you and that is what friends do! We keep an eye on one another and help if we can. Thank you for finally writing this---I hope you are happy, I am having a snottin' good cry now :) Keith,
I have been waiting two months for you to write this. It was MORE than worth the wait!!

It was kind of you to mention me but, not necessary–I am your friend and I love you and that is what friends do! We keep an eye on one another and help if we can.

Thank you for finally writing this—I hope you are happy, I am having a snottin’ good cry now :)

]]> By: velvet http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1531 velvet Wed, 09 Dec 2009 14:46:57 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1531 Thank you Dorothee. It was a difficult period but with all the wonderful support I received from my family and friends, I think I can safely say, I made it through and have become a stronger, wiser and more determined person. Thank you for sharing your story too. Really sorry to hear that. Maybe you should write about it too. I actually wrote this piece about a month ago and I found it very therapeutic. It helped me channel my thoughts and emotions and most of all, it provided me with a much-needed outlet to express my feelings. Writing certainly helps in that sense. Thank you Dorothee. It was a difficult period but with all the wonderful support I received from my family and friends, I think I can safely say, I made it through and have become a stronger, wiser and more determined person. Thank you for sharing your story too. Really sorry to hear that. Maybe you should write about it too. I actually wrote this piece about a month ago and I found it very therapeutic. It helped me channel my thoughts and emotions and most of all, it provided me with a much-needed outlet to express my feelings. Writing certainly helps in that sense.

]]> By: Dorothee http://velvetescape.com/blog/2009/12/till-its-gone/#comment-1530 Dorothee Wed, 09 Dec 2009 14:32:55 +0000 http://velvetescape.com/blog/?p=3004#comment-1530 This is such a moving story Keith! Thank you for sharing these very private moments of your life. I'm struggling to hold my tears back as I think of my own dad. He died in 1997 (I was just 17). He had a heart attack and I never got the chance to say goodbye or tell him how much I loved him. Now, almost 13 years later it still hurts to think about him. I wish you all the strength you need to get through this difficult time in your life. We are all here for you! This is such a moving story Keith! Thank you for sharing these very private moments of your life. I’m struggling to hold my tears back as I think of my own dad. He died in 1997 (I was just 17). He had a heart attack and I never got the chance to say goodbye or tell him how much I loved him. Now, almost 13 years later it still hurts to think about him.
I wish you all the strength you need to get through this difficult time in your life. We are all here for you!

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